Free Will’s a Motherfucker

From God,

to us,

through Lone Wolf:

Over the past week I have been staying overnight at a temporary shelter set up for the homeless at Belmont United Methodist. It was here I met the one they call the Lone Wolf.  Honestly, he is singlehandedly the most wicked man I have ever met.  He has evil pumping through his veins and the devil’s angels reside in him.  He has told me things I doubt I could ever repeat.  Even as this is the case, it is our duty to remember God has reconciled Wolf to himself through Christ Jesus and as a member of the ministry of reconcilation that God has entrusted with us (2 Cor. 5), I (and all members of the Body of Christ) no longer see anyone or judge anyone by worldly standards.  Therefore, we do not label or judge this friend of ours by what he has done but by the potential reconciling he himself may undertake if he decides by his own free will to submit himself to God.  That being said, we have had over 10 hours of conversation in this past week and I am currently just coming home from an all nighter spent talking with him.  It is truly unexplainable to understand how or why God uses him the way that he does to speak to me these past few days.  But our God is unpredictable!  He uses the foolish to shame the wise, the weak to shame the strong.  The murderers to be the leaders of his greatest movements (Moses and Paul).  In these following short quotes that I managed to remember and write down you will get the picture painted very clearly: this man knows God, very personally.  And God has spoke to me all week through him to me.  He has scripture unexplainably written on his heart and quotes it fluidly throughout our talks together.  But as he says on a very regular basis, “there is a difference between believing in Christ and actually serving him.”  Even the demons believe.  Everyone pray for his heart to be softened and for Christ to bring him to his knees in submission because in his eyes, the battle is over and there is no chance of coming back.  But I, and all followers of the Christ who sets people free know that this is not the case.  Our God is a God who saves.  That’s what he does.  It’s sort of his thing.  Peace be with you all and I hope you’re having a great week.

Free Will’s a Motherfucker

I was an Indian, them mfers loved to carve it up on people.  Then I was in the marine core; and you can call it defense or fighting for your country, and everyone from every different nation thinks they’re right.  But it’s murder.  That’s all.  We were murdering God’s children.  We raped and pillaged areas all in the name of war and the USA.  And then after I got out, I started doing hits.  Killing, violence, and being a warrior is all I know.  It’s not right, it’s wrong.  And I carry that with me everywhere.  It’s what I’m good at.  And I’ll pay for it.  No doubt about that.  But atleast God won’t call me a liar.  He’ll just tell me to get on down there.  I look happy, I smile… even laugh sometimes.  But it’s all bullshit, I ain’t happy.  I’m miserable, daily.

If you get upset at your buddy and bloody his nose, you’ve sinned.  Period.

You can pray for me, but unless I take that first step freely, God’s not going to do anything.  His heart aches, I know he’s up there just crying.  But we’ve got to submit… lay it all down.  Get that relationship boy.  Where when you mess up God takes you around the neck and scruffs you up like a father.  It’s what I’ve been trying to tell yall; free will’s a motherfucker.  He wants people to come FREELY.  Pride, greed, malice, boastfulness are all deadly son.  They’ve taken over my life.  I’m being tormented daily.  And free will is just all that shit wrapped into one.

You got to build that relationship.  Why do you think God made us?  He loves us.  He wouldn’t have sent his son to get the shit beaten out of him for days and nailed to a cross if he didn’t.  Just the thought of a sinless man being nailed to a cross and beat like a dog is more than I can bear.

You meet very few men of peace.  Martin Luther King was a man of peace.  There’s more of me out here than there are you.  We’re in every nation, all around the world.  Men just like me.  Men of peace are rare.  Peace is of God.

I know the bible.  But so does the devil.  You got to know your enemies.  I know God and I have more faith in him and Jesus then most people in the world.  I just don’t serve him.

It is ALL or NOTHING.  None of this I love Jesus and God shit then fucking your sister the next day.

Your God is using me right now, he will use anything and anyone according to his purposes.  Hell, I don’t want to be talking about this… if it were up to me I’d say lets go get a bottle of liquor and a couple whores.  I don’t give a fuck, I just don’t care.

And don’t go getting holier than thou and swelling up on pride.  Don’t you EVER FORGET WHERE GOD MET YOU.  You ain’t no better than anyone else.  Justified by faith in the name of Jesus Christ.

You love me.  And I thank you for that more than you’ll ever know.  I respect that.  And I don’t respect too many religious people.  And I’ve never liked a white person.  But I respect you.  And that’s saying something.

Only one thing that can make a heart break; Pure Love.  Pure honest love.  Not lust.  Pure.

Talking about Heaven; God uses gold like we use blacktop.  It don’t matter to him…

Do you want your rewards in Heaven or do you want your rewards here?

You’re not his slave, you’re his Child.  And how much more we will know this in Heaven.

You can stop a man’s life.  But you can’t stop a man’s God.  I would never touch you.  You’re forbidden fruit.  You make me ache all over and I just want to kill you.  But I’d never sin against God in that way.  I can’t.

You have free will with everything but death is certain.

You got to be careful what you do in the name of Christ.  I will get you.  I’m sneaky. (referring once again to himself as the enemy) Keep your mind and heart in the same place.  In God, in Christ, otherwise you’re worthless.

Devil’s house is divided.  They are against each other.  They cannot win, they will not win.  It’s not pure.  GOD is not divided.  The devils fight each other, they can’t win because they can’t get together as one.  You got to know who you’re fighting boy, you understand that?  Christ has ALL the power!  God stands united, the Heavens are of one mind, one soul.  He reigns over it all.

God doesn’t turn his face from you.  You turn it from him.  God wants the relationship.  He wants you.  Loves you.  You can’t have that kind of relationship with the devil.  He is not pure.  He is a bumpy and divided road.

It hurts being in the world.  Christ has got to come and hug you, forgive you.  It’s like a pulling match; Tug o War.

Man will not see that it’s his fault.  He’ll blame it on God or anyone else he can find, when actually man does it to his self.

Free will’s a motherfucker.  Makes us do stupid shit.

I know I’m living a lie.  But I still live it.  Don’t understand it, but I do it.

No psychiatrist gonna help me, no drug gonna make me better.  Only Christ can heal a man like me, and I won’t let him.

If you really want Jesus you got to seek it!  If you don’t seek it you’ll never know true love.  Pure love.

God will give you what you ask for.  He gives it to you because he loves you and wants you to fruitfully multiply.  He wants you to walk in his light.  Only a fool wouldn’t do it.  I guess that makes me a fool.  To know to do good and not do it is an awful sin.

Half-white Half-Indian doesn’t matter who you are.  You are God’s.

That’s the problem right there, I know better.  God told me directly, not man.

You can be wise and be a foolish man.  If you don’t do what He says then you’re a fool.  And once again free will’s a motherfucker.

I can just see God sitting on the throne miserable looking down at us, aching, and we won’t listen!  Won’t repent!  Won’t give him the worship he deserves.  Lord have mercy on us.  And He will spit us out like warm water when that day comes.  I promise you that.

Humans don’t like to be wrong.  We can’t admit our faults.

When you preach, you gotta let God lead you.

There’s not enough time in the day to worship God in his greatness.  It’ll make you a junky.  You’ll be a jeezyjunky and it will be a wonderful thing.  He’ll fill you up.  Make you think of life and love.  Only God can make you a man.

Only God can fill you with mercy and compassion.  His purpose is not to judge you, it’s to love you.  All he wants is to love you and for you to love him back just as much.  But we’re stupid.  Free will’s a motherfucker.  We’re just ignorant.

Just think about Jesus and the whore that was about to be stoned.  Jesus could have rocked that girl to death.  But he had mercy.  He said any of you who are without sin go ahead and cast it.  And then set her free.  Remarkable.  He loves us.

Figure out what you want and go after it.  Listen to God.  Not me.

All people are garbage without God.  A lot of people will say I’m a good man.  I’m a decent human being.  And they are.  They raise a good family, send them to college, make a small fortune here on earth but it’s all worthless without God.  It’s chaff in the wind.

There’s no glory in money.  And there’s no glory in war.

God’s heart aches.  He hurts more than we do because He knows more.

God wishes we would change and be His.  Try your hardest to be pure in mind, heart, and soul.

Hell, God made David so happy he danced around the streets naked.  And a lot of people saw him too.  It wasn’t just a few.  A lot of people saw that.  He was crazier than hell.  He had that relationship.

People preach the bible, But I’ve seen the bible.  I’ve seen the waters part.  But most people don’t see it because they don’t believe it.  They have no faith.

Pure light.  Pure being.  You can’t look at Him without turning white.  He will frost your hair to the whiteness of a snowflake.  And that’s something you won’t hear from a preacher.

Strive for it, seek thy face, yearn for his spirit.  Talk about that in the pulpit for once.

Preachers don’t let heart and spirit lead them.

If you’re gonna do something, go all the way.

A lot of people preach it, but they don’t believe it.  If they did they would touch people.  Heal people.  Try to be more like Christ in every way.  Lord, increase our faith.

You have to believe for healing.  Belief of a mustard seed and you’ll be healing people.

On service for Christ:  You didn’t get nobody saved.  You let God use you as a vessel!  He is doing it through you.  You’re not going to do anything.  All you do is ask for forgiveness and make yourself clean in his eyes.  Let him work the rest out.  Get out of the way.  It’s Christ in you!

Ask for forgiveness.  Then let him use you.

Pray for the Holy Spirit to stay in you, guide you, lead you.  That’s what you do.

If you won’t do it with your whole heart, soul, and mind it’s worthless.

The devil is an asshole, but we let him be.

If you don’t have the relationship then you have no God.  If you don’t have a friend and father to talk to then you ain’t got him.  He wants your heart and He wants to talk to you.

People won’t admit their problems.  That’s why we can’t get close to God.

It’s not God’s choice that ANY should perish.

Our life’s like a revolving dumbass.  We kick ourselves in the ass daily.  We’re so ignorant.  But oh, we’re so intelligent!  We think we know everything

People want religion, not salvation.  We’re stupid as shit.

Man needs to look in the mirror daily and say: Lord, I don’t want to see me, I want to see you.  Rid me of myself.  I don’t even have the slightest clue what you want me to do, lead me.  Save me Lord because I’m worthless without you.

God loves everybody very deeply.

If you ain’t careful, you’ll live a lie like I do.

We are little children.

God don’t make us idiots, we make ourselves idiots.

We ain’t all wrong, but we ain’t all right, when it comes to following Christ.  If we’d keep that in mind we wouldn’t have 103 different denominations that claim to be exclusively following the correct Jesus.

You must live where your light shines so much, so bright, that you will bring people to Christ.  They will see Christ in YOU!  God says be like me.  A lot of people think “ok, we’ll go out and insult this poor bastard and then try to invite him to church.  What the hell is that?  You got to tell him about the deep love of Jesus Christ.

Preachers mean well.  They’re not all bad.  Pray for them.

All you can do is pray for people and suffer for thy brother.

God’s in your head.  But it’s what you do with it that matters.

We hinder ourselves, but we also let others hinder us.  We get mad at someone and then instead of praying for them we simmer in anger.  That’s not Christ-like.  That’s just foolish.

If you have love in your heart, nothing can destroy you.  If you’re in the Father and in the Son, the enemy can never destroy you.  The devil has no power.  God has the keys to death.  Christ is the only one that has the power.

Seek His face with all your heart, soul, and mind.  Death has nothing.  God is life.

We think we know it all, and free will fucks us up again.

Get into relationship with Him.  Talk to him.  Be his child.  Listen to his Spirit.  You have to eat, breathe, and want it.

When you eat God, you become a being like nothing else on this earth.

The blood of Christ makes you perfect in God’s eyes.  Let that blood seep into your soul.

Do everything He says automatically without thinking.

King David wanted to fly back over the gates out of his kingdom and go back to being the poor peasant shepherd because all he wanted was that relationship!

God can heal you if you’ve got f-ing AIDS.  Your faith has made you whole, Your faith has healed you.  If we just had faith, nobody has faith!

You see boy, God don’t work how everyone says he does.  Don’t get me wrong, follow the word of God, that’s the word.  But He does what He wants.  If a man jumps off a building and asks Jesus to save him on the way down and really means it… if he submits; He’s saved.  The other stuff is good and you should do it out of obedience if you can.  But it’s only for people who have time for it.

It’s simple; repent with all your heart, soul, and mind because he died for your sins.  And then do his will.

Be reconciled,